Overview 

Remember, our thoughts accumulate to become our beliefs. In this segment, we are going to learn that our beliefs have been built and reinforced by the constant conversation that goes on in our minds, 24/7/365. When we can control the nature of that conversation, our self-talk, we can change what we believe and expect, as well as what we achieve. 

Objectives 

By the end of this unit, I will be able to: 

• provide a definition of “self-talk.” 
• describe how self-talk affects my habits and attitudes. 
• describe how my self-talk affects the challenges I am willing to take on. 
• provide examples where I can use “the next time…” to change a habit. 

“You must control your self-talk, or it will control you.”
Lou Tice 

Key Points 

• It is vitally important to control our thoughts and we do this by controlling our self-talk, that constant conversation that goes on in our minds, 24/7/365. This self-talk is essential in forming our self-image, and can either build us up or tear us down. In fact, understanding the power of self-talk may be the most important single thing we can ever learn.
• We think in three dimensions. The words we use trigger pictures in our minds, and then we add emotions, based on what has happened to us in the past. Words – Pictures – Emotions.All of this is stored in our Subconscious to become reality – our strongest pictures that define who we believe we are – our self-image.
• Our self-talk affects nearly everything we do by defining and reinforcing our beliefs.
• These beliefs play out in our self-image, which controls nearly everything we do. And we have thousands of self-images, depending upon the situation at hand. Our self-image controls how we act (our Performance Reality), which is then reinforced by our self-talk.
• Our self-talk goes in two veins: Am I acting like me, or not like me? This is where the Creative Subconscious comes into play, constantly regulating our behavior to match the internal pictures we hold of ourselves. We use our self-talk to cause us to maintain our current behavior, or move us to the new behavior we want. As we are making those desired changes to ourselves, we want to make sure the new pictures are stronger than the old. We use, “That’s not like me,” and reinforce the new picture with, “The next time . . .” using words that trigger the new picture.
• There are four levels of self-talk, each with their own advantages and disadvantages: 
  • Negative Resignation – lowest level signified by “No way.” “It can’t be done.” 
  • Recognition of the Problem – signified by “should, could, wish” but no intention to fix the problem.
  • Vow – stops the behavior, but doesn’t provide a replacement picture to draw to. Signified by “No more.” “I quit.” “Stop it.”
  • The Replacement Picture – all about “The next time…” Provides the new picture that we are seeking. 
• Controlling your self-talk is probably the most important lesson we can learn. It affects every belief and every behavior we play out in our lives. If we tell ourselves that we can’t find our keys, our Creative Subconscious goes to work to create a scotoma to our keys. If our selftalk says, “This is going to be hard,” we have a negative attitude toward the task at hand. Our self-efficacy is constantly being reinforced by our self-talk.
• Our Subconscious doesn’t care which way we go – the old picture, or the new one. It only follows the strongest picture. If the new, replacement picture is stronger, then our Creative Subconscious goes to work to make sure we act like this new reality. Maintaining sanity is the primary job of the Creative Subconscious, and it’s automatic. So, we put this natural process to work for us, and make the changes we want. 

Key Concepts 

Performance Reality – how we act and perform, based on our current, dominant self-image. 

Replacement Picture – the new picture we give to ourselves in order to change a habit or attitude, or a belief, that allows us to act, behave or perform at a higher level than our current picture allows. 

Self-Image – the accumulation of all the attitudes and opinions we have perceived about ourselves, that form our subconscious picture of who we believe we are; our imagined self. 

Self-Talk – the constant conversation going on inside of us, that allows us to evaluate and assess our behavior; positive or negative, it appears to have a confirming and affirming effect on establishing our self-image. Self-Talk has three components: Words, which trigger Pictures, which cause Emotions to be brought to the Conscious mind. 

“The next time…” - an active vow to better our performance at the next opportunity; a phrase to begin creating a replacement picture. 

Application & Review Questions 

Download the interactive PDF and save to your hard drive. Then, take time to reflect on the Application & Review Questions and answer them in relation to the concepts presented apply to your own life. 

(See Downloads) 

Optimism vs. Pessimism 

Download the interactive PDF and save to your hard drive. Then, take time to reflect on the Application & Review Questions and answer them in relation to the concepts presented apply to your own life. 

(See Downloads) 

Extended learning video – TBC 

Lou’s Stories (See downloads)